This week, Courtney Nicole interviews traveling videographer, Estelle C all about paving your own trail in the world, despite what society wants you to do.
Check out Estelle's Website, Instagram, and LinkedIn to hire her and learn more about what she does.
Want to engage with Courtney Nicole? Check out Courtney Nicole's LinkedIn, Sidecar Solutions, and Nonpareil Coaching for next steps.
This week, Courtney Nicole interviews traveling videographer, Estelle C all about paving your own trail in the world, despite what society wants you to do.
Check out Estelle's Website, Instagram, and LinkedIn to hire her and learn more about what she does.
Want to engage with Courtney Nicole? Check out Courtney Nicole's LinkedIn, Sidecar Solutions, and Nonpareil Coaching for next steps.
I am here with Estelle. I met Estelle online and I'm excited to introduce her to the podcasting world. Here, we're talking about What Our Parents Didn't Teach Us. So this podcast is all about lessons that we've learned the hard way, hopefully empowering others with them so that they can learn them in a faster manner and be successful sooner. So Estelle, you mentioned that you love the topic of success because it couples with your dream job and talking about how dream jobs aren't always the dream, how sometimes they're more difficult, and every job has a little bit of an aspect of not awesome to it. So tell us more about what you do in work and just kind of unpack that a bit for us.
Estella C:Yes. Okay. Thank you so much for having me today, such a, such a pleasure. So. For me, I always thought that growing up, people ask you, what do you want to do? And I thought that when I say that answer, it means when I go to work every day, I must be feeling super pumped, super excited. I love my job and everything. But then once I started working, I realize it's actually not the case. So I was working as a videographer and a video editor in Sweden, and it has always been my dream job because I love how dynamic it is to create something new. Especially when I, I got to meet different people, new people every day, it was so exciting. So I thought, okay, this must be my dream job. But then there was a point where I was just mostly attaining meetings with the producers and then like, like the investors to tell them what we're about to shoot. And that part, absolutely. It just, it just bored the soul out of me. I just felt so lifeless. And I was like, maybe I don't like this job so much after all. So I started having this whole soul searching process in my life where I was like, what do I like and what do I don't like? Is this really my dream job. And then it took me a while to realize that, there is for me, at least, there is no such thing as the perfect dream job. In every dream job, there will be a certain degree of unpleasant work that you will have to endure. Like I love being a videographer, but sometimes I don't enjoy going to meetings. Explaining myself. And then like, especially when you had to talk about budgeting and everything, I don't like that. But I have to do it because it's part, it comes with the job. And then sometimes I have to stand in the snow for five hours just to catch that one shot. It's not pleasant. It's this cold, it's freezing. It's not pleasant. It all comes with the job. But for me at the end of the day, I feel happy with what I create. I can look back at the journey, the experience and smile. And that's how I know that is good for me. That is my dream job. So I think you just need to evaluate, like when you hit that little hiccups in your life, you just need to think does the good outweighed the bad? Instead of just like, think of a dream job as you need to love a hundred percent, because I really doubt anyone loves their job a hundred percent. So yeah, that's my perspective.
Courtney Nicole:Well, I think perspective is a huge part of success. I think one of the biggest things that I've worked on with a lot of my clients is how you look at it and how much that impacts reality. Right? I had one client who was like, I just can't wait to be successful. I can't wait to get there. I can't wait to, have all this stuff. And I said, well, what does success mean to you? Like what does a dream job mean? And I think it's a choice to focus on what it is instead of what it isn't. So a lot of times it's, okay. Successful is being able to pay my debts every month. Successful is having a roof over my head. And I think it's just such a vast definition for everyone. But it's important that you stop before you try to assess whether or not you have your dream job or you have success, or you have all these other things, it's setting the parameters ahead of time. And you'll realize that you are successful and you have your dream job much sooner. Because there'll always be things you could debate. Oh, well, I'll feel more successful when I have a nicer car, or when I have a nicer house, or like you can always go up. But to realize that level of contentment and just being like, you know what, this is an awesome job. Look at what I get to create and look at the final product and look at the fact that I'm living in Turkey like you're living now. Like that's just so cool to make a choice and to decide that that's success, like that's happiness, that's contentment, and make it based on something that you can achieve. Instead of this like far out idea of like, when I feel happy every day, then I'll be in my dream life. And I'm like, I just don't think the world is up for us feeling happy every day. For one, if we always felt happy, there would be no way to know when we're truly happy. So, I don't know. I think it's just, it's taking the good with the bad, but really choosing to focus on the good parts of it, choosing to focus on the things that define it as successful or dream or, or, or. Right?
Estella C:Yeah, absolutely. Like they say the bitter moments in life make the sweeter ones even sweeter.
Courtney Nicole:Very true. I know when I'm out with friends and we're all, we all have different drinks and, pre COVID, we would all try each other's drinks. Some people like them really sweet and I've never thought something was bitter until you go from one to the next. I think that contrast is beautiful.
Estella C:Yeah, I absolutely agree.
Courtney Nicole:When you decided you wanted to have this dream job, what were some of the things you were looking for?
Estella C:I asked myself in 10 years when I look back in life, what would I have wanted? Like, what would I want to create and achieve in 10 years? And for me, I never want to sit in an office and do that kind of stuff. It's just, it's just not me. I need to go out there. I need to explore. I just, I really like socializing and I love adventures. So for me, a dream job would be having a freedom for me. I think freedom is my dream. I love being free. We've got lists of how you interpret it. I just love being free. So that's why I decided to become a digital nomad, to travel the world and work for me, having that freedom. Having the freedom is not a job, but that lifestyle is part of my dream and working towards it is like my dream job in a sense.
Courtney Nicole:It's beautiful. I'm a freedom junkie. I usually start a lot of conversations with clients about like, where do you not feel free and how can you feel more free in that area? I have a lot of people that come to me and want to quit their jobs. They're miserable and they're like quick, help Courtney! I want to quit my job. And more often than not, they actually ended up keeping their job because they find out that it's just a negotiation of freedom within the current bounds of their job. And I love people, like yourself, that are able to actually seek out that freedom in a really real way, in a tangible way, you know, like you could pick up tomorrow and put your backpack on and go to the next space. What do you think is like the area or the moment that you felt most free in life?
Estella C:To be fair, for me the moment or the period of my life, where I felt absolute freedom, was funny enough, was actually when I was in university for once, I didn't have to worry about making a ton of money because I was under the umbrella, like under the shield of a university, I could go on like go here and there with school programs. And then when I'm abroad with a school, I, I was just completely free to do what I want. I got to meet new people, make new friends and then classes, my biggest concern was failing a class, but then once you get out of the school umbrella to shelter, it's just, Oh, real life is really hits you. You have to register for taxes and then like find a new job I'm like, it's this job. Good enough. And, Oh my gosh, I still enjoy the freedom and I don't want to go back to school in a sense, like, I don't, I don't miss studying, but I miss the freedom studying accompanied.
Courtney Nicole:I definitely think when there is another authority that's kind of providing the basic needs, then you can move on. I think it's interesting what we will sacrifice just for those to be met just. For that moment of just not to worry. And I think youth is one of the most under appreciated freedoms. When you live at home or you have people providing for you, or like you said, the umbrella, like your only job, the only responsibility was grades. And I wonder if there isn't a little bit of a nugget in there that says freedom is being able to just focus on one thing. Like freedom seems to go away the more options we have. As soon as it's oh, well, I could, build a career or I could travel the world or I could. And as soon as all these options of the decision paralysis sets in, it almost feels more restrictive the more options you have. Because when you're focusing on just one thing, it seems like it's very freeing.
Estella C:Yes, I, yeah, absolutely agree with that. That is true because I feel like more freedom comes with more responsibility. In order to achieve more freedom, you have to take up more responsibility. You have to actually do more planning in order to achieve the level of freedom you're after. So it's definitely not easy for me. It's worth it. It's just this not easy being free. Doesn't mean you don't do anything. It's actually a lot of work. Okay.
Courtney Nicole:Sure. And, honestly, when I've talked to people, especially very successful individuals, when they talk about work, it's something that they always want to do. Really successful people don't stop working, they just do more of what they enjoy doing. So I think, the whole have that phrase. If you do what you love, you'll never work a day in your life. And I don't know if it's necessarily about not working. It's about work that you're passionate about. It's about your work and your life, and every other part of you intertwining into something that's beautiful that can be shared with the world. People talk about work-life balance and I'm like, why did they have to be separate? Why can't it just be us living out things and being rewarded for that life?
Estella C:Yeah. I agree. When I was working as a videographer, I could work for 18 hours a day and still be like, come on, let's keep going. I love this. Let's take one more shot. And then, and then like when we're doing a TV show, I'll be like, Oh my gosh, I love it. I want to be there five hours earlier and stay for like, stay for like 12 hours after to clean up and stuff. Yeah. When I'm doing things I'm passionate about, really, I don't really feel the passage of time. I just, I just want to stay here and get everything done. But when I'm doing things that I don't like, it just feels like, Oh, even two hours, it's like, Oh my gosh. When is this going to end? Okay.
Courtney Nicole:Yeah, for sure. I think time might be one of the biggest factors that people mention when they talk about not being free. Having that freedom, because I think it's one of the things they feel is taken from them. Have you found that there's anything you can do to manipulate time or to control time a little bit better? You were mentioning like time was just not an object when you were enjoying what you were doing.
Estella C:For me sometimes I usually put less enjoyable tasks in front so I could get it over it and look forward to the things that I actually enjoy doing. Like if I have meetings, I try to push it early in the morning and then I would go on with the shooting and everything, because that would make me feel better. Otherwise, when I'm shooting, I would just be like, Oh my gosh, look at the time I have a meeting at three, we only have two hours left. It's just not good for me mentally having that stress of something unpleasant tasks coming. And for me, it's just, if I don't like that particular task, like if I don't like to meeting, I could kind of like lie to myself, comfort myself and be like, it's okay. It's not so bad, but deep down when I attend, I know I'm not going to like it. So I don't even try to lie to myself anymore. I just try to move things around so it's a better schedule.
Courtney Nicole:Nice. So you're talking about like lying to yourself or getting in the right head space and doing all this. It kind of poses the question. Where do you believe is the secret sauce for you for when to measure these things? Is it before and try to get your head right and the expectation set, is it during it, you know, kind of kicking out things that you are enjoying, or is it after the fact when you reflect on it and try to say, like, was that fun or was it not fun? Was it good or not good?
Estella C:For me, it's definitely like a work in progress. Sometimes I prepare myself beforehand. I know this is not going to be pleasant. I keep telling myself, okay, you need to be prepared. You're not going to like this, but you need to, you need to get over it. Like, you need to go through it. It's just part of your job. But then sometimes it's like, okay, I'm sure it's not so bad, but then I go through it and I'm just like, yeah. You know what? I really, really don't like it. Especially during sometimes like when I'm in a really bad mood, I could show my frustration. It's not professional, but sometimes when you just reach that point, I was just like, Oh, I'm just so done. I hope this is, this is over. And then after that I was, I would like looking back. It's really not that bad, but I didn't act too professionally is my fault. And that's something that I need to change. So for me, he's definitely, well, it's a learning curve.
Courtney Nicole:It's interesting to me because everyone organizes their day differently. And I think that's the beauty of humanity is we get to find different ways to be successful. And I think what a lot of people are looking for is just that validation. There is someone out there who's the same as you. And so I think sharing your story is really powerful because it empowers others to be able to say, Hey, having a bad day is okay. And sometimes you think it's going to be good and then it isn't. But that doesn't mean it's the end of the story. You can still reflect on it and still change the way that that memory gets to stay in your mind.
Estella C:Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. I think sometimes you need to really adjust your mindset. Especially at the end of the day, when you have had a bad day, you need to go home and really sit down and take the time for yourself and reflect on that day. It depends on what kind of person you are. Obviously, for some people it's not good to overthink it, but for me, I try to evaluate what really happened. Because for me, I want to be as professional as possible. So if it's something that I did, I would be like, Oh, it's just like the situation. I didn't enjoy it. I will think what could I do in the future? Because I can't promise that the same situation won't arise again in the future. So I just have to think, what can I do next time?
Courtney Nicole:Yeah, but it was moving forward. Just make it a part of the journey, make it a part of what's happening next. And it doesn't have to be as big of a deal. It doesn't have to just be like pass or fail all at once and this pressure everyday. It's just, Hey, that's something else that we learned. So, I love to ask younger people because I think we have this more sense of community where we are in it with everyone else. You know, We see someone else our age and we want to help them out or give them any kind of advice or assistance that we can. We're one of the greatest trading generations, where we just will like trade services or trade knowledge or trade time. And it's really neat to see the abundance and the generosity that's growing with that. So I like to ask what are the types of things that you would say, because this is basically a platform for the entire world. So if you knew people your age and your disposition and your mindset were listening, what's something that you wish everyone could really get?
Estella C:I wish they could understand that freedom is not given. Freedom is something that you have to chase. I mean, obviously for most of us, we are lucky enough to live in a free world, in a free society, but still that doesn't mean freedom is automatically granted. Because I feel like in every society, there are certain degree of restriction, right. For most students, when you're out of university, you're expected to get a job, live a comfortable nine to five life, just be stable. And your parents don't tell you that you can also live a lifestyle by traveling around, like moving to different places that you like. Sometimes it may not be the most stable job. Maybe you do contract work like three months here, three months there. But, if that's what you like, you should at least try it out and at least go for it. And that is something that school doesn't teach you, schools don't tell you to, do contract work for six months. They tell you like, no, get a tenure. So, if you feel that your heart wants something, at least give it a try because a lot of times, the books they don't necessarily tell you what you should do. Write your own book. Maybe next time, the next generation will be reading your books.
Courtney Nicole:Yeah. I love that. Just let the creativity flow and you never know where the money's going to come in from, traditional money has kind of gone the wayside. People have opinions about retirement and whether or not I'm leaving, be there by the time we're done and ready to do that. So just allow things to flow through you and chase what you really believe will bring you that freedom. And then see what happens because there's no failure. There's just trying a different way and trying it again. You mentioned something in there about like, it's basically the constraint that people put around themselves. And I want to revisit earlier in the conversation where you were saying you felt the most free when you were the most restricted. And kind of an invitation to discuss constraints and boundaries. Because I think that a lot of youth especially feel that there'll be more free when they're less restricted. There'll be more free when their parents don't have a curfew on them. Or there'll be more free when this, or more free when this happens. When in fact like society. And if you look around for examples, you can do the most when there's the most restriction. Like people that go bungee jumping, there's a lot of safety parameters around that. And a lot of do's and don'ts and a lot of double checks. Even if you look at like freeways, where people go very fast on the roads, the reason they can go fast is because of the restrictions. Because people aren't allowed to just drive right across it, like on city streets. If people could drive across freeways this way, which they do in some countries and it's real exciting. But if people could just literally drive straight across the freeway, then you wouldn't be able to go as fast because the danger would be that much higher. So people can go fast on a freeway and they can feel that amount of freedom in that amount of time that they can reclaim because there's structure because it's like you do drive here. Here's the sideline. Here's the barrier. You don't drive over here. And there's ways that people can come on in ways people can get off. And because of all of these rules, we can get there faster. So I kind of want to talk a little bit about the things that maybe in your life you thought would be a bummer. Like, darn! I wish I could go this way or I wish this boundary or something that held you back that ended up actually bringing you more freedom beyond just your college story.
Estella C:It's really interesting what you said, because it's absolutely true. I felt the most free when I was the most restricted with schoolwork and everything. Because I, all I had to do is complete my duty. Like my, my schoolwork, and then I'm free to do what I want. But once in the society is more just like, you need to be stable. You need to climb up your career ladder. And once I fill up all those things, I don't have the energy to enjoy the tiny little bit of freedom lift. I just simply don't have the energy anymore. And that's really hard. The question you asked is really interesting. Aside from my college story, I feel like I'm lucky enough to be from a family where I am given a lot of freedom. My family never told me about what I should do in life. Even if I played with my lifestyle, I moved to a different country every few months, and then I do different projects, I still get a lot of support, so I feel less restricted. When you compare me and friends back home, there is obviously a huge gap and difference. And in order to fulfill that gap, I feel that if I go home, I need to start from scratch because I need to fill up that gap. So should I continue and not go home? I feel like that is kind of one of the things that has been pulling me back because I really don't know how to deal with that. But at the same time, it's just, I'm learning so much more abroad. So for now, I'm going to continue this lifestyle and we'll see where it takes me.
Courtney Nicole:That's really good. I think the idea of restriction has become much more clear during COVID times. I think that there were a lot of people that panicked when the lockdown happened. And there are a lot of folks that on the other side of that have found a lot of freedom. They finally found freedom in finances when they weren't able to just spend on every whim and every will that they had. They had to kind of hold back a minute and say, well, I can't go out to eat 17 times today. Can't go out to eat at all. So now what do I really want to spend my money on? As it became more restricted, there was more abundance. And I think that that's just a. Backwards lesson that life has taught us through this whole restriction phase. Who do you really care about? Who are you willing to bring into your pod? To be able to really be raw and real with. Who do you continue to communicate with even if you can't go over to their very fun house? And all of those questions have really brought about a sense of genuineness. And I think a sense of opportunity in us because we were always saying like, okay, when this lockdown lifts, this is what I'm going to do. This is where I'm going to go, and this is who I'm going to be. And that clarity can't come when you've got 5,000 voices and the kids have 7,000 activities to take them to like, it just can't in that moment. So I think that's one area for me that I've seen with myself, with my clients, with my family, where it's just been really beautiful to watch the amount of abundance that came out of that restriction.
Estella C:For sure. I think COVID really encouraged people to rethink and reevaluate their life in a sense. For a lot of my friends is like, they realize that life is too short. Who do I want to be? Do I want to be here doing this? Do I want to live a life that my family wants me to live? Or like society expects me to live? Who am I? And it's just, I feel like everyone has started to kind of, search themselves to see what exactly do they want, who they want to be. I guess that's the silver lining of this pandemic huddle. I still wished it to be gone as soon as possible. Everyone's fine. So many of my friends, they actually started their own projects because they can not leave their house. Some of them lost their jobs and it has actually encouraged them to venture out and start their own things. Some started doing their online business and then some transitioned and then some even changed their career path. And then some decided I'm going to take this break for myself mentally, and then just transform my, my entire self. And that's, I think that's really beautiful.
Courtney Nicole:Yeah, that's gorgeous. Very good. Well, I think we'll wrap it up here. If people wanted to get in touch with you, or hire you to come and do some crazy remote video work or some writing or other things, if you want to let us know where we can find you and some of the projects that you would love to work on, we'll put that out into the world.
Estella C:You can reach me on my LinkedIn profile. My username is E S T E L L A hyphen C. Estella C. My website is S T O R Y T A L E J.com. If you want to follow me on my Instagram, my Instagram is E S T E L L U S K A 28. So you can find me on my website or on my Instagram.
Courtney Nicole:I can't wait to see more of your adventures and follow you on Instagram. Hopefully you posts lots of travel pictures cause it sounds like you're going to some really neat places. If you want to follow me, I go by Courtney Nicole online. You can check out Sidecar Solutions or NonPareil coaching, and we hope to see you on the next podcast. Thanks so much for being with us.